If there was a Guinness World Record for the largest number of fights, my mom and I would win it every single time!

We’ve seen and fought it all.

The good fight, the ugly fight, the bad fight, the funny fight, the interesting fight, the life-changing fight, the I-know-you’re-right-but-I-need-to-prove-a-point fight, the fun fight, the beautiful fight, the I-am-telling-you-what’s-best-for-you fight, and the list goes on.

Chances are, if you can think of a type of fight, we’ve already had it and won an award.

My mom and I fight every day, but if I were being generous, I’d say every other day.

She’s one person I know I have two very strong emotions for.

But is it just me? I think anyone with a mom might be able to relate, right?

But the fights didn’t start today.

Growing up, my siblings and I fought a lot. Sometimes I’d fight with one of them, then form alliances with others if I didn’t think I was strong enough to win alone. It’s funny thinking back on it now. I can’t imagine how my mom dealt with five teenage kids at the same time.

It must have been tough for her and my father or maybe it wasn’t because of the value they hammered into our ears. My parents would let us fight because they knew we understood that in our family, we fight, we scatter, and we then come back together again.

Over time, my fights with my siblings reduced because obviously, we grew. But my fight with my mom didn’t. Could it be because I am her last child? Or because she thinks I’ll always be a baby? Her baby?

I wonder why we fight so much. But fighting doesn’t mean we don’t love each other. In fact, I think we fight because we love each other so much. Isn’t that ironic?

Lately though, our fights have evolved. We still argue but now, we fight knowing it’s laced with love.

Just a few days ago, we had one of our usual episodes. But surprisingly, she called me.

“I’d like to apologize, Ruka,” she said.

It’s okay Mummy. I forgive you,” I replied laughing. “I knew we’d be back together again. It was just a matter of time so no worries. But I’d like to say something too.”

“Okay, what’s it?” she asked.

“Well, as the daughter of Seven Seven…”

“Oh, about that,” she interjected quickly. “Your father wasn’t Seven Seven.”

“What?!” I exclaimed.

“Oh yes, he was Five Five. Your father was Five Five. I noticed you wrote Seven Seven on your blog.”

“Wait, what!? You read my blog, Mummy?”

“Oh yes, I do. You write so beautifully. I always knew you were a good writer, and I enjoy reading your blog,” she said.

“Wawu! That’s interesting. I didn’t know you read my blog. Thanks, Mummy.”

“Okay. So as the daughter of Ibrahim Five Five. I want to thank you for everything you’ve done for me and our family. You’ve held us together. I know we fight about everything. Thank you for always showing up, especially on days I show my bad side.”

“No baby. You don’t have a bad side,” she said sharply.

“Okay, thanks for letting me know how perfect I am, Mummy,” I said jokingly.

“You aren’t perfect, but you do not have a bad side. You have your shortcomings the same way I do. We’re human and we’ll always have shortcomings. We are very, very flawed creatures. We are not God.

We make mistakes. We argue. We disagree. We disappoint each other.

Why do you think we fight all the time? 

We will never stop fighting. The most important thing is knowing that we love each other, and we keep showing up because that’s who we are. As you probably already know, we fight, we scatter, and we come back together again.

That’s what family does. That’s what loved ones do, even when it is hard or you do not feel like it. We show grace and mercy to one another.

And that’s what we’ve always done and will continue to do.

So no, you do not have a bad side. You have your shortcomings.”

“Mummy,” I said with teary eyes.

“I love you my sweet precious baby.”